Holidays and “The Sandwich Generation.” How Do You Find a Balance?

As we approach the holiday season, we look forward to warm gatherings, making memories, and the joyful spirit that infuses this time of year. However, as a member of the “Sandwich Generation,” this season also beings unique challenges for your family, especially with the dynamics of holiday time and seniors.

You want to focus on your children and nuclear family, but you also bear the responsibility of caring for an aging parent. While you may not realize it now, the holiday season often brings conflicting emotions, especially with holiday time and seniors, and as you attempt to navigate this time of year, you need proactive strategies for making the most of the holidays for your children, parent, and yourself.

Tips for Happy, Healthy Holidays for Your Family

• Find ways to include your aging parent. For seniors on the decline, they often feel isolated or depressed during the holiday season. They perceive the loss of traditions past, and sometimes feel forgotten amongst the hustle and bustle. While you may not be able to include your parent in every single activity (nor should you be expected to), you can make an effort to provide festive opportunities throughout the season. These activities need not be elaborate, and should always account for physical or mental limitations.

For a physically limited parent, consider a drive around the neighborhood to see Christmas lights displays. If you want to keep Christmas Day for your nuclear family, host a special dinner that includes your parent on Christmas Eve or another day. Above all else, remember that it’s ok to keep the focus on your children. Just be conscious of the little ways you can help make the holidays special for your senior parent as well.

• Take care of yourself mentally and emotionally. As someone who faces dual caregiving responsibilities, you understandably experience increased stress during every season, especially when it relates to holiday time and seniors. However, this time of year can make you feel pulled in too many directions.

Practice vigilant self-care and take action if you feel yourself stretched too thin. Talk to someone, feel permission to say no, and use whatever stress relief techniques that work for you. Likewise, understand that conflicting emotions come as part of the “Sandwich Generation” package. You may experience feelings of resentment, which are perfectly normal. No one wants to feel like they have to compromise their traditions to accommodate others. Remember that these feelings are natural and don’t make you a bad person.

• Understand that sadness may be inevitable for both you and your parent. For all seniors and their adult children, major holidays mark sometimes uncomfortable milestones. In the back of both of your minds, you are reminded that this holiday may be the last. This leads to feelings of bittersweet sadness that are completely natural. Rather than focus on these feelings, channel your energy into creating positive memories. However, never give in to pressure to make it “The Perfect Holiday.” That only exacerbates feelings of stress, pressure, and sadness.

BlueSea Care, providing senior care services for Seal Beach, wishes you a healthy and happy holiday, by focusing on balance between everyone’s needs, you can truly make this a joyful season for everyone in your family.

If you want to focus on the holidays differently, then let our caregivers take the responsibility while you focus on positive memories.